So This Is What Live Blogging Feels Like

This is sorta new to me. But unless you've been living under a rock for the last--oh shoot, I don't know how many weeks--then you must have come across at least one live blog going on during the broadcast of American Idol. Well, now it's my turn. Randy made me stay at home in bed again today for good measure, so I am sitting in front of the television watching THE! SEASON! FINALE! Who will win??! Oh, the tension in the air is palpable! Oh, who am I kidding? Everybody knows David is going to win! (For those of you who couldn't care less about AI, that's a little joke--both finalists are named David.)

Sidebar: I obviously have to be sick to even have time to watch TV so perhaps I am not the person to tell you what you should or should not watch but I implore anyone who reads this: BOYCOTT THE MOMENT OF TRUTH ON FOX TV! I have seen 2-3 promos for it already and it is nothing but trash and filth and sleaze. The end.

Okay, we're nearly an hour and a half into the finale and it's honestly been a whole lot of nothin'. I should mention here that live blogging only works if your memory is longer than the length of the last commercial break--now that I'm ready to talk about some of the things I've already viewed, it is becoming apparent that they are so UNmemorable that I can't even remember what I was going to write about!

Okay, I just saw the funniest thing I'm likely to see on this broadcast--some old footage of Gladys Knight allegedly "auditioning Pips" spliced with Ben Stiller, Jack Black (love him!) and Robert Downey Jr. in matching suits and acting pretty much like the goofballs that they are. Now THAT was funny.

Okay, could sweet little Carrie Underwood's dress have been any shorter?

I've just seen two commercials for Guitar Hero featuring the two finalists and clearly, "Rocker David" didn't get that name for nothin'. Which leads me to another observation: If you're going to audition for American Idol and expect to receive millions of votes from the general public I expect you to be able to, you know, actually sing. But now that I've been subjected to all these medleys with past contestants, I have no problem admitting that some of them have perfectly lovely voices, it's just that they are not versatile vocally and they end up looking (and sounding) a little out of their league.

Seriously, George Michael gets the first standing ovation?

Okay, I got sidetracked with iTunes so the show is over now but I totally cried when David Cook got the nod. He just seems like the nicest guy! And the point I have been meaning to make throughout this whole post but am just now arriving at is that I would have been happy with the crowning of either David because I don't necessarily think either one is better; they're simply different. Like David Archuleta just isn't a rocker (hence the lame Guitar Hero commercial), but give him an upbeat pop song or ballad and he will not disappoint.

I know a lot of people were concerned about "Archie" and how, at his tender age of 17, he was likely to get chewed up and spit out by "the machine," (whatever that is), so perhaps it's all for the best. I've also heard it said in the past that to actually win American Idol can be the kiss of death (the last two winners evidently haven't made much of a mark since their respective coronations), but to make it into at least the Top 5 guarantees some exposure and maybe even the record deal that used to only be awarded to #1. With that said, I do so hope that David Archuleta releases an album eventually because, winner or not, he has got an unbelievably beautiful voice and I just happen to be a sucker for those "saccharine" ballads that he has been dissed for all season. As for David Cook, I don't think he'll go the way of Jordin Sparks and Taylor Hicks before him--I think he'll make exactly the kind of record he wants and I will totally drop $15 of Randy's hard-earned salary to buy it!

Postscript: Note to self . . . Live blogging doesn't really work so well when the show you're live blogging about ended an hour and 46 minutes ago! Just a tip . . .